Thursday, June 6, 2013

I Think My Phone Needs Rehab

I have a friend who takes pictures of his food.; Italian, Mexican, Sushi - he doesn't discriminate.  As soon as the plate arrives at the table, he snaps a photo of it.  I'm not sure if he is more impressed with the presentation of prepared food placed in front of him or whether he lives with eternal optimism that the plate in front of him will yield the very best dinner he's ever had, thus the need to immortalize it for all time.  I used to think it was very odd that he did this at nearly every meal he attended.

"Used" to.

The other day I decided to plug my phone into my laptop and dump everything inside of it for safekeeping (I live with this irrational fear that I will lose my phone everywhere I go thus losing every valued photo-memory and my grocery list - which, once lost, I would never be able to recreate by memory).    As I watched the (gasp!) 1000+ photos upload, I had the one to three second window to watch the last year's worth of activity pass by.  And while there was plenty of documentation of the places I visited or people I saw; what surprised me the most is how many pictures of alcohol I have on my phone. And since I clearly don't remember taking all of these pictures, I could only come to one conclusion.

I think my iPhone is a drunk.

Apparently my phone has collected strange array of photos of the tosspot variety.  It seems to come across bottles of wine that it wants to remember later: 










And despite its map app, it seems to get lost a lot - or else it just needs to remember where it was the night before:











Apparently my iPhone is also very celebratory - it appears to offer many toasts:






It also seems as though my phone is not particular when it comes to imbibing.  Anything is game:






And when my phone doesn't feel like going out - it has a well stocked cellar:


And when the cellar is "dry"?...not to worry - my phone knows where to go shopping:



Yet through it all - my phone also has a sense of humor about its lush-ishness:
 




So while some people love to photograph their food, my phone loves to capture its liquid libations.

Y'know...with all of this rambunctiousness, I should probably scour the Internet for incriminating photos...



Dammit!  

Can anyone recommend a good intervention app?





*iPhone is registered to Apple - for which they make a crap-load of money from.  Since I'm not making any money off this blog, I figured no one would mind me using the term since - well, let's be honest - it's not like they need any more....